This picture has brought me calm the way no picture ever has. It hope it does for you as well :)
I have come to the realization that we are here to serve others. We are here to look after each other and put others first whenever possible (you still have to maintain a healthy balance in life and live a decent life). I genuinely care about people and that comes through whenever I deal with anyone (aside from when I’m being stupid and sweating the small stuff) and this causes people to care in return and to help me in my time of need.
You have to give to receive. I have seen and heard about this in action. The Higher Power only wants to help us. When we show we’re deserving we get that help. Being deserving means we’re learning our lessons in life. Being a Scrooge means we’re Not learning our lessons so life heaps on another helping of pain and grief to teach us. There truly is a method to the madness; we can see this if we open our eyes.
We show people how to treat us. This sums up all my bad experiences in the past. It’s very hard to admit but I have let people treat me a certain way. When I didn’t like how things were going I didn’t walk away. I would continually give that person yet another chance to change, which never happened. One ex treated his next girlfriend quite nicely, but when he had interactions with me he went back to his old ways. She showed him she’d only allow good treatment whereas I had showed him he could be a jerk with me with no repercussions. There’s a spoken word poet I like, Suli Breaks. (He did this great video ‘So you want a degree’. You should check it out, it’s really good.) I’ve linked his ‘He’s not’ video. It gets golden at around 3 minutes. Steve Harvey says basically the same thing. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJzBtL2SKZg)
Show gratitude. Here in North America we’re taught greed and want. Chasing the next new toy or keeping up with the Jones’ is a never ending vicious cycle that will never bring happiness. We have to be able to stop and realize how great of a life we have. I try to mostly ignore marketing; that new shampoo does Not do what they say it does. That new beauty cream will not necessarily even be nice to my skin. The best beauty product is Confidence! The best thing you can put on your face is a Smile :) The best way to age well does not come in a bottle but by Stop Worrying and be able to ‘stop and smell the roses’, hear the birds, etc. At any moment you should be able to stop, look around you and see beauty and wonder. To the old angry me this was like a hidden world that I Just Didn’t See. It’s so sad that so many people still wear these blinders. When you have a calmness about you your worries take care of themselves. Recently I could have ended up homeless due to a school loan issue but I just accepted the situation and thought of ways to have my stuff taken care of and knew I’d likely be able to get a shelter bed somewhere. My calmness likely directly worked for me; my landlord allowed me to pay rent late. It’s only now that I can look back on my life and see all the blessings I’ve had along the way. I experienced the unconditional love of maternal grandparents and had a mother who, for the most part, loved me. They’ve all left me years ago but to have Had that love makes me luckier than many. I’ve had no great life by any stretch of the imagination but it has definitely been colourful/interesting and it has ultimately led me to be the person I am today. The trick is to not see the bad things but rather the good. Things are done For you, not To you. I am a much stronger person today for what I’ve gone through. I am also very gentle and kind, this seems to also be a result of ‘colourful’ lives (sandpaper that polishes us).
Be grateful that you have a job that gives you money to pay the bills, be grateful for the food in your kitchen, be grateful for your 5 senses, be grateful for your health. You don’t have to think of people in 3rd world countries who don’t have these, people in your own city don’t have these. Also be grateful for your Ability to be grateful. Again, the people around you don’t all have this ability. You can create your own happiness. That is a wonderful thing :)
Smile! An inner happiness and peace will literally make you shine :) We give off vibes and a happy vibe will attract happy people and situations to you. Be kind to everyone you meet. Never carry over anger from any past hurt, if 2 people in a row hurt you that doesn’t mean the 3rd one will. Have a clean slate for every person you encounter. Allow them to write on that slate, don’t assume for them what they would write. We all have bad or off days. It could be that you’re encountering a great person on an ‘off’ day. Mean people are usually just someone who’s hurting or having a really bad time, try to not add to their woes by being mean in return, or to your own. The smallest gestures have had profound impacts; have made people change their mind against committing suicide.
I often joke about using my powers for good vs evil. (I DO have one super power; whenever in line I tend to be invisible – both to cashiers and the people behind me in line. I’ve also had bus drivers close the door on me Three times!. I just KNOW the one time I try to make this super power work for me in a bank it will fail ;) ) We actually Do have a lot of power, each and every one of us. The hardest part about life is thinking outside of the box that we’ve grown up to believe in. The box doesn’t actually exist. There’s an experiment where fruit flies are put in a small bottle with the lid on. They try for 20 minutes to get out, then realize how futile their efforts are and stop. When the lid is taken off they actually starve to death in this little bottle because they still believe that they’re trapped. It’s easier to deal with and manage billions of people if they believe their bottle has an air tight lid. Guess what? There is no lid! It’s your choice to live life knowing all the wonders of existence are available to you or to live in a little bottle. Truly your choice. Seeing is not believing. Case in point: Is electricity real? Yes. Can you see it? No. Game – set – match.
As I progress along my journey to happiness and peace and see how my life is changing, how I’m changing, I become more and more surprised at how willing people are to just Accept their lot in life. So many people truly believe there’s nothing they can do about it, and that’s sad.
A classmate compared me to a guy when I told him how I was handling all the stress and financial situation of being a student; I’m chill. I didn’t really like the comment because it took me 38 YEARS to become this chill. And I’m much better for it. You will be too if you try it. Bills are due? They’re still due whether you freak out or not. Money all gone? You’re still broke whether you get upset about it. Instead of wasting precious energy on worry you could put that energy into ideas on how to become unbroke :D There’s always a way, always a solution, if we’re clear headed enough to look for those solutions. Sometimes we have to make our own solution but there IS one.
When we expect life to get better, opportunities will come our way. But we have to be willing to work for them. There’s no free lunch in this world, but there are free appetizers or dessert to help you along the way ;) Some incentive as it were. Don’t just Believe life will get better, Expect it! Demand it! And then be willing to do some old-fashioned hard work to make sure it Does happen.
I’ll give away a secret right now. The one thing that will solve All problems is Love. A dose of Love will cure what ails ya. There is no emotion as strong as love. There is no force more powerful. Learn to integrate love into your life, into your daily routines, and you will be well on your way to happiness and peace. And health as well.
Learning to take complete responsibility for everything you do is also a required part of your daily life. No excuses, no blaming others for anything. Blaming and complaining stop. If you don’t like something figure out a way to change or improve the situation. Blaming and complaining are not allowed on this journey. It sounds hard but once you’ve replaced those bad habits with good ones (you can never get rid of habits, just replace them) they stay.